I have the lifelong habit of biting off more than I can chew. Mom’s gentle warning “Your eyes are bigger than your stomach!” was foreshadowing for the rest of my life – my ambition is more than I can physically handle.
So, what then? Do I lower my sights? How can I make things manageable enough to actually complete?
“How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.” My sister said as she was helping me with my multiplication tables – this entire scene feels significant. Like a dream chock full of subtle clues about my future.
The theme of setting small goals to accomplish big things has been a constant in my life – however, I’ve never liked this way of doing things. In fact, I’ve stubbornly resisted this method with every ounce of my being – but, it seems to be just as stubborn as I am because it keeps reappearing.
In school, I had a ‘goal card’ I had to make fresh with new daily and weekly tasks to accomplish a long term goal. The start of each day was to evaluate what was done yesterday and was the aim was for the day in context of what needed to be done that week – month – year.
The stinging irony of my schoolbooks being named “PACE” isn’t lost on me either.
But, that’s all so dreadfully boring and unmagical if you plan things to happen and then they happen. It’s always more exciting if things just serendipitously fall together!
This is a prime example of having the answer screaming at you and trying to find ‘another‘ answer because you don’t like the truth. “I don’t know” starts out as an excuse, and then with maturity, becomes a blatant lie to yourself.
I realized that I’ve been looking at it from an all or nothing mindset – It’s either routine or spontaneity – not both. But this isn’t true at all. In fact, my love of winging it can be incorporated when things can’t go as planned. Maybe, the solution is in the problem.
So here we go again, with the daily/weekly/yearly goals – but with an attitude adjustment and foresight of how to deal with the boringness of it all.